Blues, The

Author:
Keywords:
Inflation Types:
Popping:
Date Written: 
07/15/2004

As I tried to open the door to the local joke shop i found that it was locked. This was really weird for a thursday afternoon, the window bars werent even down yet so i knocked on the glass. A small elderly man walked out from the back with a disturbed look on his face. He opened the door and spoke.

"what do you want?!" he growled

"I wanted to come in and look around to find something but the door was locked..are you closed?" i asked.

His face contorted like he was sucking on a lemon

"well the door is locked isnt it?!" he asked angrily.

"yea it was...but you dont have any signs up or anything saying you were closed" i said.

He looked at me then back into the stort.

"oh...listen im sorry for sounds like an ass, i forgot to put the sign up...well...you can come in and look." he reasoned.

"thank you very much sir" i replied.

I walked in and started looking through all the shelves and boxes. I found a couple exploding cigars, some hand shake buzzers, you know the old stuff.

"do you have any new things? you know like brand new on the market stuff?" i asked.

He looked at me for a moment...

"what exactly are you looking for young man?"

"well i wanted to trick one of my friends really badly for her birthday."

"hmmm well...i just got in a brand new product...would you like to see it?" he asked me

"sure" i said

The little old man went into the back room for a minute and came back holdig a small rectangular package.

"This" he said "is brand new from the wonka company."

I read the letters on the package and it read "WONKA'S THREE COURSE DINNER CHEWING GUM".

The man continued to explain "It is exactly like the movie in everyway, the only difference is that you wont actually turn into a blueberry but you can actually feel the food running down your throat so that the chewer will think they are going too like in the movie."

"Ill take it!" i said and payed the man.

As i walked out i heard the man luaghing but i paid no attention, tomorrow was gonna be great!.

When I walked around the corner into the caffiteria i saw all my friends sitting there. I couldnt wait to give Erica the gum, but all of last night and this morning i couldnt help but wonder if the gum was really like the movie...

"hey guys!" i said to them i walked up to the table.

"hey dustin" they said.

I gave erica a hug and kiss on the cheek and wished her a happy birthday before i sat down. I kept reaching in my pocket and rolling the gum package around. At the point i changed my mind, i was gonna try the gum and ill trick erica another time.

"you will never guess what i got at the store yesterday guys" i said

"what?!" everyone asked.

"Its the three course chewing gum from willy wonka!" i explained

They all looked at me with a puzzled look on their faces.

"your kidding right?" asked ryan.

"Nope im not" i said this as i pulled out the packge from my pocket.

They all looked in amazment at the package.

"Im gonna try it right here to see if it really works." i explained.

"I dunno of you should do that dustin" said Erica.

"Dont worry, i got it from the joke shop, nothing is gonna happen." i said.

As i said this i popped a peice in my mouth and began to chew. After a few seconds phil asked:

"well....whats it like?"

I chewed for a second more and then it happened, the flavor hit me. It was hot ceamy delicious tomatoe soup

"its tomatoe soup! wow its so hot and creamy, i can actually feel it rolling voer my tongue down my throat to my stomach." i said in an excited voice.

Everyone had an uneasy look on their face.

"Will you guys calm down, nothing is gonna happen." i said as i stood up.

I could taste the gum changing to something else.

"second course is comin up....hmmmm roast beef and a buttery baked potatoe!. its so good. hmmm the roast beef is so moist." i said in excitement.

They all knew what was next and were all very anxious see what would happen.

" looks like you already had enough" ryan luaghed as he poke my stomach wich had gotten a little bit bigger from all the roast beef and soup.

"Hey!" i yelled "dont worry bout it!"

Once again i could feel the gum changing. It had changed to blueberry pie this time.

"MMMMM Blueberry pie!! its so delcious, the best blueberry pie i have ever tasted.!" i exclaimed to everyone.

Talk about an over kill i had been chewing the gum on its blueberry pie part for over five minutes now and it was still going strong. at this point it was like being pumped full of blueberry juice.

"damn, i feel so full right now...this is alot of pie....i cant beleive is still going.* i groaned.

"ummmmm dustin.....your turning a violet color..." said josh.

"what are you talking about?" i asked as i looked down at my arms.

Josh was right! i was turning violet!! what was going on?! the old man said that this wouldnt happen.

"DUSTIN!! SPIT out the gum right now!!" Erica yelled, but it was too late, the effects had already started in on me. by the time i was already a deep dark violet color and the pie was still flowing down my throat.

I could feel the pressure growing in my stomach. There wasnt alot of room left in there so it had started to grow. i could see my stomach start to swell outward with juice and strain against my belt.

"WHATS HAPPENING?!? i yelled.

"Your filling with juice!!" yelled Phil

All i could do was sit there and look at my expanding body. Everything was filling with juice, my entire body was ballooning. My arms began to stick up at my sides. My belt was becoming tighter by the second.

"HELP!!! HELP!!!" i screamed.

There was nothing anyone could do now. finally my belt burst off and flew accross the room. I coulsnt beleive what was happening. one by one the buttons on my shirt popped off. All i could do was stand there and watch as everyone gawked at me swell with blueberry juice. My midsection was becoming more and more sphyrical.

"stick him with something!! hes gonna explode!!!" someone yelled.

"i Feel so funny!" i explaimed "theres too much juice....im gonna pop any second!"

now my body was completely round save for my head and hands and feet. I jsut stood there filling with more and more juice until.....

POP!

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