help

I don't know what i think, but i wanted to tell you about something that happened to me once that was interesting.

When i was a virgin, and expecting to stay so forever because of what i wanted to do in the bedroom, i had a conversation with a woman i'd only just met. She was a goth, and as is typical of them, she said that she knew that one day she would kill herself, and how she'd do it. She asked me about it and i said i'd blow myself up like a balloon until i burst. A few minutes later, i had my first sexual experience with her, not oriented around inflation though. It was as if even using the imagery without admitting it was sexual somehow magically led to us sleeping together. I've never done anything like that since, though other partners have known, but sometimes i wonder if there was a connection. I was very surprised when that happened.

I have been with three other people. The first one was shocked and thought it was disturbing. She was particularly freaked out by the idea of getting pregnant after i told her. However, although she didn't like it, she still loved and accepted me. The next one never found out. My current partner accepts it, but i don't want to say too much out of loyalty. However, i would agree with a statement made elsewhere on this board that even if they're not into the fetish in itself, they can enjoy the power they have to turn you on by doing something like acting it out.