There was a topic about unexpected and unintended inflation-related talks. I gonna ask about something different: have you ever discussed BI with others.
As for me, I've done many times, but girls only. All girls I've ever dated and just friends.
Important addition : I'm not BI fan (may be I was, at age of ten or so), I prefer body deflation, however, most of you there enjoy BI, so I ask about it.
There was a topic about unexpected and unintended inflation-related talks. I gonna ask about something different: have you ever discussed BI with others.
As for me, I've done many times, but girls only. All girls I've ever dated and just friends.Important addition : I'm not BI fan (may be I was, at age of ten or so), I prefer body deflation, however, most of you there enjoy BI, so I ask about it.
I have, and with some people I regret doing so, not because it affected anything but because I think to myself: why the fuck did I say that to this person? Its not a myth: men CAN, and will, think with the other head at times...
But Ive never had a friend whom Ive told. Internet friends, yeah, and people that have seen pictures of me even. Although, most dont know its a "fetish", its just a quirky thing I throw out there. I have the crazy funny personality working for me there. Ive never told anyone thats had some permanence in my life and that I come in a more personal contact than through internet.
Most of my friends know becasue I am the kind of person that gets into weird talks all the time so most of the people I know except of course my family. Most find it weird but one of my friends liks GTS adn we both agree they are somewhat like.
I've only talked about it once, with my last girlfriend. It was long-term, and we shared everything. In order to continue the relationship, I obviously had to tell her what I was into. I told her after about 8 months together, I guess. Best decision I ever made! I doubt we would've been together for 5 years had I kept secrets.
Besides that, I go as far as talking about how I like larger women, but go no farther. Usually you'll get people agreeing with that.
I have been tempted in the past to tell others...
But, I'm pretty secretive. I keep things to myself.
Sometimes I test people, by dropping little hints, to see if they share the fetish though. Usually getting boring answers or ignoring the hint, because they have no idea what I'm even attempting to get at, obviously. The chances of just randomly meeting a woman interested in body inflation are pretty rare.
Although once, I did meet a woman online, randomly, who happened to be into weight gain. That was pretty surprising. I dropped a couple of hints about body inflation and all of a sudden she talks about how she likes to see males gain weight.
My wife knows. That's a good thing. My ex-girlfriend knows, because I told her. We are good friends even today but we were never sexually active, so that's sort of a push. I brought it up with her in an email and she didn't take the bait, so it's one of those off-the-table things. And then a very good friend that I grew up with used me computer once, went poking around in areas he should not have, and now we don't talk much. I really felt violated by that.
I never bring up the topic, and sort of don't have anybody new to bring it up to anyway. My circle at work would not understand, even if they did care.
Brother figured out, and has most likely forgotten.
I told my girlfriend just in case, and again...most likely forgotten.
Its really less thrilling to other people then I thought...
Told my wife, and now she's into it.
Those of you with significant others - you REALLY need to let them know. I'll echo Dan - it is a good thing.
Told my wife, and now she's into it.Those of you with significant others - you REALLY need to let them know. I'll echo Dan - it is a good thing.
I would beg to differ on that... I told my girlfriend with much emberessement and she was quite repulsed by it. It didn't help that she went searching online shortly after that, stumbled across alot of my 'popping' artwork and thought I liked to torture women. It's been a horrible strain on our relationship and I find myself burying it deeper and deeper and only coming out when she's not around (like now). I can honestly say that telling her was NOT a wise decision.
My condolences, CattyN. That really blows, and not in a good way.
I can kind of relate to Inflate123. The only non-inflation-community person who knows about my fetish was an older woman I knew (strictly as friends) who took it upon herself to type "Alec Deluxe" in her search engine and found my inflation stories. OK, I guess I should've figured someone might do that; but what really pissed me off about it is that she did it specifically to find out what kind of sexual stuff I was into. Really, she made no bones about it. I was pretty disgusted by it, and I certainly didn't want her to be the first person to know about it.
I am seeing a woman now, and I'll probably tell her about it eventually, if for no other reason than I'm lousy at keeping secrets about myself. I'm probably a little safer than CattyN, though, because I'm more into self-inflation, so I don't really have to worry about having the "torture women" label stuck on me. That's sad that it happens to others.
I think it depends on the person- as usual with relationship stuff, there is no one right way.
Yes, it depends on the person. I recently had this conversation with a european friend of mine who knows (and has no problem talking to me about it. Its like she reads my mind, and she never even heard of the fetish), about telling spouses about your fantasies, and think its a bad idea, cuz it almost broke her parent's relationship once.
But, it depends on the person, and you too.
Like Catty. I mean, if you were all embarassed about it, maybe that made her take it in a bad way. For this stuff one has to be very firm, and strict, so the other person gets, from your body language, that you are not timid, and basically, will take no shit from nobody (Ive even read this attitude helps you get women too, showing them you are not intimidated).
NEssex, Ive also dropped hints to unsuspecting women online, and a good percentage take the bait lol I know it sounds like an awful thing to say, but we both end up having a laugh, she having a weird and funny conversation, and me feeling accomplished with my developing theory that people like expansion, they just dont know it :)
CattyN, i'm really sorry about that. That hurts in a really sensitive area.
My first girlfriend didn't like the idea at all and was worried that if she got pregnant i might be turned on by it, and saw it as a medical problem. My wife isn't exactly into it. She knows everything though, and she is into something quite similar, so it's OK, though i can't help wishing she was into exactly that.
There was a weird incident i'd like to understand better though. I was once talking to a woman, just chatting normally and not aware of anything sexual going on, when she asked me how i'd commit suicide, so i said i'd blow myself up like a balloon and she responded that "that would be horrible", but a few minutes later we ended up having sex. That's how i lost my virginity, and i've often wondered since whether it was a sexual signal from my subconscious, if she picked up on it consciously or subconsciously, or if it was just coincidence.
CattyN, i'm really sorry about that. That hurts in a really sensitive area.My first girlfriend didn't like the idea at all and was worried that if she got pregnant i might be turned on by it, and saw it as a medical problem. My wife isn't exactly into it. She knows everything though, and she is into something quite similar, so it's OK, though i can't help wishing she was into exactly that.
There was a weird incident i'd like to understand better though. I was once talking to a woman, just chatting normally and not aware of anything sexual going on, when she asked me how i'd commit suicide, so i said i'd blow myself up like a balloon and she responded that "that would be horrible", but a few minutes later we ended up having sex. That's how i lost my virginity, and i've often wondered since whether it was a sexual signal from my subconscious, if she picked up on it consciously or subconsciously, or if it was just coincidence.
Maybe she talking to you about how you would commit suicide was HER little secret signal. Some people are into that. Maybe she saying that it would be horrible, is code signal for "wow, kinky and creative"
I'm very sorry to hear that too, Catty. I told my wife when we were dating, and it worked out (our relationship was neither helped nor hindered by the fetish). But I guess there's always a risk.
Maybe it's the difference between girlfriend and wife. I do get concerned when I hear of people who are married and say things like "Oh, I could NEVER tell my wife!" Like, wait a second...this is the person you've already sworn to spend the rest of your life with...who else CAN you be completely honest with? Your spouse has already promised to accept you for who you are; honesty at that stage is kind of crucial.
I've always offered my story and image archive to my wife, just making sure she understands that I kind of archive a lot of stuff whether it's my personal fave turn-on or not. I have a lot of stories going back several years, so when someone says "Does anybody have that story..." I can hopefully say "Yes, porn librarian at your service!" So I've said, hey, it's there but it's not necessarily there for me. If you have a question, I'm happy to clarify why I archived any given thing in my collection.
She looked at the stash once, but didn't care much. She already had enough ammunition, apparently. :)
So...do you think the relationship can be repaired, Catty? Is it a case where you can say, "Hey, I was honest with you and now I regret it because your reaction, and I don't want this to be misunderstood, but it currently is"? Like, can you work through it?
Honestly inflate, i don't know...
we're kinda at the point where we just don't talk about it. I don't say anything, so she doesn't either. She knows i come to the internet and i have alot of friends in 'those' circles, but we never really talk about it.
Every now and then a movie might come on with some inflation in it (such as Harry Potter 3) and she'll look over at me and cock an eyebrow as if to say "THIS is what turns you on???" but that's about it.
Other times, however, she's kinda encouraging and discouraging at the same time. She knows that sex sells and that I could make alot of money off of working on commissions, and making inflation related material... and since we're so poor right now, that's always tempting... but then she doesn't give me the time to do it, and she doesn't like it, so it makes me nervous to even consider working on it when she's around.
I really wish it was just acceptance. Just her saying "i understand you're weird, and it's ok. I personally don't like it, but that's ok if you are turned on by it." But instead it usually devolves into conversations about what the 'roots' were to my becoming an inflation fan, almost like she's trying to disect my brain and find out what caused my abnormality so it can be pychologically repaired as if it were a mental illness. It's a little natural for her to be diagonsing me like that, givin her own personal history, but she doesn't accept the "i don't know, i just DO" answer. There has to be a LOGICAL REASON for it and that's kinda what's barring us from being able agree on something.
I love her greatly and would never give her up. But not liking my sexual fetish is kinda hard to cope with sometimes. I can only hope that as time goes on she becomes more understanding.
Well, there is a logical reason, theres just no way to know, or at least theres no way to know at the time, or its based on factors you just dont know, or are impossible to remember. Would she go for that kind of answer. I mean...who really knows why they have a foot fetish, or why they like big noses, or toes, or spanking, or exclusively blonde women...nobody really knows.
Always thinking there darth!
I'm sorry to hear about your problems with your partner Catty, it seems difficult to understand why she can't just accept that it's a fetish that you 'gained' at an earlier stage of your life and it's something YOU have to live with too. Wishing you the best of luck towards sorting out a resolution.
On topic though, I think most people here know that my girlfriend's cool with the inflation scenario and likes to 'play games' now and then. I believe it's because she was THE right person to tell. I had a friend whom I'd share inflation activities with too many years ago before he moved away...
However, by far the scariest thing is that both my father and my stepmother know of my interest in inflation from viewing my artwork on deviantART... something I'm not ashamed of as, instead of being weirded out, they encourage it because it's my most popular artwork.
Truly bizarre... but appreciated a lot.
Maybe it's time I drew some more...... ^_^
I'm sorry to hear it Catty, partly because you know I've always liked your work and would like to see you profit from commissions, and partly because it seems she's just not ready to accept that side of you.
And I think you hit the key word with acceptance. Maybe she thinks that if you like it, you expect her to like it. Some of the hostility may be because she feels like now it's her duty to share that side of you, and she doesn't want to do that. My wife accepts but does not necessarily encourage or participate in all the aspects of my weirdness; could it be that she assumes you want her to dive into your secret world, rather than just acknowledge it?
The closest I've gotten is expressing a fondness or preference for pudgy girls. The traditional response is that people can see where I'm coming from. Basically, I'm not an FA, but I don't really find much attractive about skinny girls either.
DeviantART!: http://baphometdisciple.deviantart.com/