Ahh.. thanks for the reply. I really need someone to actually proof read it for me. I've actually started to do a lot of reading my self again, to pick up some hints and tricks to make the stories better.
The part 1,2 3 and so on was basicly to make it easier for to keep track of where I was in the text as I slided up and down and they just happen to stay there :P
Well excusing grammar and spelling it was an enjoyable read thank-you, maybe you should get somebody to proofread for you, there's usually one or two people willing to do so around the community.
I liked the concept alot though considering section lengths I believe that listing part 1, 2 and so on is unnecessary. If you were using them to mark the passage of time then perhaps you could just state the amount of time passed or use some sort of elipsis.
I hope you continue writing and hope you throw more things together.