Hey ppl,
So the thought came to me when mulling over how I've managed to crash 3 perfectly good relationships into the ground, more-than-partly due to my fetish, that there needs to be a dating site that caters to our demographic. I think it's only fair with so many oddly specific ones already afloat that we have something to call our own! ....aaaaaaaaand DEBATE!
p.s. this is also partly a cry for help to the inflation community if anyone knows
1. If a network of any kind already exists (especially for ppl on the stuffer side of things, mostly because I feel we are largely under-represented in the expansionverse).
2. IF anyone has any tips for making a "normal" relationship work with this quirk of ours (success stories welcome)
3. And lastly (pathetically) if there are any females who are interested in RP.
THNX
Food for thought...
I think a dating site for this particular fetish would be too specific to get anywhere. I've seen this debated a million times, and the fact is it would be a million dudes and like two girls who would quickly be scared away.
If you're looking for a stuffing dating site, check out fantasyfeeder.com it's not particularly for stuffing; but there's a few people on there who are just stuffers and not gainers.
Obviously I don't know you or anything about your situation; but I'd hazard that if this fetish was a contributing factor to ending it; it had other problems. No offense.
As I've stated a million times: I've told every partner I've ever had, and it hasn't always gone over well, but it's never ended a relationship. There's no real special trick to it; just wait for a calm, romantic moment, tell them you have a particular kink; and then calmly and confidently introduce them to your fetish. Simply at first. Then gradually over time explain more.
I'm no relationship guru by any means; but if it's a strong, healthy relationship where they care about you, they should at least be accomodating of your fetish, if not necessarily share it. If you're expecting that every time, then unfortunately you should prepare for disappointment. If you're expecting every girl to be more than accomodating, or try and force her to do things she doesn't want or push her more than she's comfortable with, expect friction.
I could go on and on, more than I already have; but I've said it a million times: look for a relationship based on its own merit in real life, and introduce this fetish into it gently. If you spend your time trawling through the internet for a partner with this fetish and then try and build an actual relationship on top of that; you're going to be looking for a long, long time.
This is a can of worms, but a big part of it is this. We need intimacy and compatibility, though compatibility needn't mean similarity - complementarity is also useful. Since our fetish is a minority interest, if we're going to go with sexual compatibility we have few people to choose from, so unless we share other things because of our fetish on which we can build a proper relationship, we're a bit stymied. I imagine homosexuals have a similar problem to a lesser degree. However, sex can mean different things, and the other meanings are also helpful to a relationship, and there's the issue of flexibility on both sides.
One thing which i think would help is the hope that there are a load of latent inflation fetishists out there, which is one reason i think it should become more mainstream. It's possible to stumble across something sexual which simply hasn't occurred to one before which one nevertheless finds exciting. Also, vanilla hetero sex is partly popular because the whole of society is basically a huge machine for making babies and that's the most straightforward way to do it, so we are massively encouraged from birth to believe that we want that, so we are hypnotised into wanting it and we end up really wanting it whether or not we would've done in, say, a world where everyone was into gay BDSM. If we'd grown up in such a world, we'd probably mainly be into that.
Therefore, and i realise this is a Herculean task for such a tiny minority interest, the ultimate answer to this is to make inflation fetishism mainstream, or at least more widely known, because then we have more potential partners. Another option is the one i've taken: use sex as lovemaking in the sense that you bond with others, express your love and so forth without any hope of really getting what you physically want. Also, it's a good way of making babies if you want to have children, so it's not that terrible. I just try to do the best i can.
I'm just telling you this for your own lack of common sense but dating sites in general do not work, let alone a fetish-based one.
Just go talk to girls IRL and eventually you'll find one who will be cool with your fetish. I've been surprised myself by friend's capicity for weirdness.
Ya wouldn't work out there's to few of us to far spread apart. And besides what's been said above is true dating sites just don't work. To few people and most don't take it serious they just treat it with a grain of salt.
I have no empirical evidence of this, but I believe most people tell their partners about this fetish in a moment nobody is talking about fetishes. Usually, the subject of fantasies is gonna come up, and your partner WANTS to know what you are into. He/she will accept whatever you throw at them if you have already established caring and respect into the relationship.
Ive had my share of "relationships" (more like friends with benefits, with some falling in love and me not corresponding them :S ) where the woman knew about my fetish and it formed part of most of our romantic play. Some were great with it, others struggled with it because of not knowing exactly what I wanted to hear of have them do, but I havent had the experience of she finding it repulsive or too crazy to the point she would not speak of it to me. Like I said: the key is respect. If she respects you, she'll accept you.
Flexibility on both sides is important. People's desires can be close enough to enable them to be compatible, for instance fat admirers and inflation fetishists can be sufficiently similar to make it work. However, sometimes people can be so creeped out by kinks that it just can't work. There are some depressing interactions in some places and in our own lives which indicate that this is often so for us.
Also, yes we are few and far between so far as we can tell, but we could be closer together if we sort of encourage people. S&M used to be subliminally in mainstream media and is now more openly acknowledged, and we could be the same. I think there are hints that there is something under the surface of people's consciousness which can be encouraged. For a start, breast expansion is basically there - most heterosexual men would surely at least be into that and women would also expect them to be. The comedy or horror aspect of inflation shows that it has major emotional power for a lot of people, and i think that can be diverted to our own needs.
I think what you're looking at is what you're going to get. This is a forum for people with like minded interests that's been around for years.
If you have a body inflation fetish, chances are you'll end up here first and formost.
If someone wants to catch up for a chat, be them male or female. They'll post a "i'm new", or a "i'll like to chat topic" (as these happen all the time.)
Perhaps, if you're looking for a female that understands your fetish. Maybe give fetlife.com a go. There are inflationists on there and I have seen females on there interested in inflatable suits, weight gain, bellies etc etc.
Whilst you may not find a girl into inflation, if she's on fetlife. Chances are she's into kinky things herself so inflation shouldn't be weird or upsetting to her.
(Please note, fetlife is mainly those into bdsm, latex, leather and so on)
Hisssssssssssss.. ...uh oh!!