a weird story that I can't find to save my life

this one's a little out there but bear with me

I remember reading a story once where the plot was about this like cyberpunk hacker gremlin girl who sat around eating junk food and watching porn on like this ridiculous 8 monitor setup all day, while also hosting a server doing all kinds of criminal shit. Her apartment gets raided by a swat team, so to protect the server she initiataes a failsafe where she blows up and violently explodes, taking out herself, the server, the swat team and the entire building. A little while after a backup of her consciousness wakes up on a sattelite in orbit, where she basically goes "I'm gonna miss eating junk food and masturbating but I have internet and can still look at porn so it ain't so bad" and that's where it ends. I swear I remember reading this once but I have no idea who wrote it or even what site it was on.