Alexandra in Wonderland

An inflationists's retelling of Alice in Wonderland

Alexandra wandered through the forest, looking rather delighted. She was a tall, slender woman in her mid-twenties with long, black hair and dark eyes. She had a full figure, but it could not be called an hourglass since her top was larger than the bottom. She was clad in blue jeans, and a black t-shirt.

"What a fabulous day." She thought.

It truly was a lovely day, perhaps an example of perfect weather. The sun was shining, the temperature mild, and the forest alive with the sounds of myriad small creatures. She shut her eyes and took in a deep breath of the fresh air.

Then she tripped on something and fell flat on her face.

"Ah, damn!" She snapped.

"Ow!" Something else said.

"Huh?" She got up quickly to see that she had not tripped over a thing, but a...well, a sort of cartoonish-looking, white rabbit in a suit.

"Why don’t you watch where you’re going?!" The white rabbit demanded. He flipped out a pocket watch and studied it. "Now I’m going to be late!"

"Well I’m sorry, but..."

"This is a terribly important engagement I have to get to!"

"Must be someone going to a costume party." She thought. "Good costume. But why’s he here of all places?"

Suddenly, the rabbit took off. He may have been a guy in a suit (at least, Alex had made herself pretty sure of this), but he hopped pretty well and was incredibly fast. She sighed and took off after him, running as fast as she could.

"Hey, wait up!" She called. "I can give you a ride if you want!"

She was approaching the guy in the suit when he suddenly turned a corner. Alex sped up and turned the same corner, but saw nothing. She took a few tentative steps forward...

...and then the ground came out from under her.

"YAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!"

She plummeted down some kind of pit, and whenever she could afford a glance down, she saw that the ground seemed to be nowhere in sight. She began to look around desperately for something to hold on to or something that could slow her descent. There were countless objects spiraling past her, none of which seemed to be following any law of physics. Some were somehow going up, while others were falling slow, as if they were a piece of paper or a feather.

Then something that was moving up suddenly stopped in front of her and began to fall at a descent equal to hers. It was a small, red box with a little hammer attached to it like one of those little emergency brakes on a bus.

"Well, those are used in emergencies." She thought, taking hold of the hammer. "Maybe this can help in mine."

She smashed the glass, revealing nothing inside the little box.

"DAMMIT!" She shouted. "I should have known as much!"

Suddenly, something flew out from the darkness and jammed itself into her mouth. It was a black tube of some sort, and when she tried to pull it out she found it to be stuck fast. There was a hissing from somewhere, and Alex felt a strange pressure in her stomach. She put her hands to it, and her eyes went wide with shock when she felt it growing.

It was swelling quickly, going from flat to round in seconds. But she soon realized it was not only her stomach that was filling with air. Her breasts were swelling, her arms sticking out to her sides with the air filling them, and her legs were growing puffy. her upper torso and legs combined, creating a massive, swollen sphere with tiny, puffy legs along the sides. Her normal feet waved uselessly at the bottom. Her arms and breasts remained independent of this sphere. Her arms were jutting out at her sides, held rigid by the air in them, and her breasts began to block her vision.

She was too perplexed to think, and only somewhere in the back of her mind did she realize she was now floating gently down the pit, swaying a bit. All she knew was that her body was still filling with air. She tried to spit the hose out, but to no avail. Her body just grew wider and wider, everything swelling at a ridiculous pace. Even her cheeks were beginning to swell round with air.

Her body began to squeak as her skin grew taught, and she began moving whatever parts of her body she could still move in desperation. Just when she felt ready to blow, she landed gently to the ground. The hose popped out of her mouth, and the air gushed out of her mouth so fast she was thrown back.

She sat up, back to her normal size. Somehow, her clothes had even gone back as though they had never been stretched. She just looked herself over for a moment, before placing a hand atop her head.

"That was odd." Was all she could think to say before passing out.

She came to slowly, her eyes opening and vision kicking in before anything else. She stood and looked around, and found herself still at the bottom of the pit. It seemed there was little in this room that a wooden table in the middle and a single, green door off to her side.

"I guess I go through there." She thought, heading for the door. But when she opened it, she saw that behind it was a hallway much thinner than the floor itself. She turned sideways to try and get through, but her breasts were too large to allow her through the narrow doorway. "Hmm...never thought of the size as a bad thing. Now what?"

She looked back at the table, wondering what could be there. She ran over and saw that it had a bottle and some kind of wafer on it. The wafer was labeled "eat me", and the bottle had a card on it that said "drink me".

"Like hell I will!" She shouted. "Lord knows how long you’ve been here, or what you are!"

She looked around a bit, and her face fell.

"Then again, you’re the only other thing here." She took the bottle and popped it open, and took a tentative sip. She put it down, and waited. The liquid had tasted somewhat cherry-like, and was cold. But if it had been supposed to do anything, she wasn’t sure what.

She crossed her arms over her chest, and jumped when she intercepted it a lot earlier than she was accustomed to. She looked down, and her jaw dropped as she saw that her ample bosom had grown even more ample!

"My God, I must be an H-cup!" She thought, looking down at her once large, now huge breasts. She couldn’t believe she hadn’t felt them growing, and couldn’t quite understand how her clothes had grown along with them.

"Well if I couldn’t get through that door before, I sure as hell can’t now!" She snapped, looking at the doorway. "Wait...the cookie-thing!"

She picked it up and took a small bite. This time, she felt a sort of uncomfortable feeling of constriction in her breasts as they quickly shrunk down to their original size. Reluctantly, she took another, tiny bite. Her breasts shrunk even further, until she was nearly flat-chested.

"Won’t need you any more." She said, flinging the cookie into the darkness like it had burnt her hand. She picked up the bottle and slipped it into one of her pockets. "But you I do need."

Now the proper size, she slipped carefully through the tight passageway. It was rather long, and she was beginning to wonder if it would ever end when she caught a glimpse of light. She sped up, and finally made her way out.

Squinting against the sudden, intense light, she looked around. She was surrounded by the most incredible array of plants she had ever seen! So many colors and types, all of them she knew but none of them that were supposed to exist in the same, mild climate she was in. The sun was warm on her, a slight breeze keeping it from being hot. The few, puffy clouds in the air seemed to only exist for aesthetic purposes.

"Wow..." She said, practically breathing the word. "How wondrous!"

She looked around a bit more, breathing in the deep air. She pulled off her sweatshirt, leaving only her black T-shirt. It was then that she remembered the bottle, and she pulled it from her pocket.

"Now to remedy this little problem." She smirked. "Oh, thank God no one was around to hear that horrible, horrible pun."

(The author apologizes for the pun)

She pulled the cap off the bottle, and quickly downed a half the contents. She waited a moment, slipping the bottle back into her pocket. She nervously watched her small breasts, hoping the weird drink would work again. She began to get worried that it wasn’t going to, when she suddenly felt a slight tingling.

Then she smiled happily as her breasts began to swell, her bra and shirt growing to accommodate her growth. She quickly reached her old proportions, and she prepared to be on her way, But something wasn’t right.

"Why’re they still growing?!" She thought, watching as her breasts continued to swell. "OH, NO! I forgot how much growth a tiny sip causes! I shouldn’t have drank so much!"

She began to grow unsteady even as her mammoth boobs grew even larger. They were huge, firm, round, and still growing. They were a good two feet in diameter and the bottoms were down to her navel, and still they grew. She stumbled and fell to her knees, and still they grew.

"SOMEONE HELP!" She screamed, but no-one came rushing to her aid. "Oh, no."

Finally, the growth stopped. She managed to struggle to her feet, but her gargantuan boobs were still pinned to the ground. She tried her best to straighten up, but her breasts were just too heavy. Each must have been four feet in diameter, and if she were standing they would probably go down to her knees. At this point, she assumed they were a good half her weight, if not more.

"HELP!" She called again. This time, much to her amazement, she got a response.

"We’ll help!" A freakish pair of egg-shaped men said, coming in from behind a set of bushes.

"GAH! Who’re you?!"

"We’re Tweedledum and Tweedledee." One of them said.

"HEY! I thought we agreed I got top billing!" The other snapped back.

"Nonononononononononononononononononononononono!" The first replied. "We agreed you got top billing on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays! I get top billing on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays."

Alex just raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Yeah, but today’s Sunday!"

"Right, and we agreed I’d get top billing on all odd-numbered Sundays, and you’d get top billing on even-numbered."

"But today’s the twelfth!"

"Exactly. It starts with a one, so it’s odd!"

"You go by the last digit in a two-digit number, you twit!"

"No, you go by the first!"

"Last!"

"First!"

"La-"

"SHUT UP!" Alex screamed. "I don’t give a bloody hell which of you gets top billing, I just wanted to know if you could help me!"

"Well we were." The one she was pretty sure was Tweedledee said. "But you yelled at us, and now I’m sad!"

"Look what you did!" Tweedledum said. "You’ve made Tweedledee sad!"

"I don’t believe this." She thought, moaning and resting atop her bloated breasts.

"Listen, fellas, I’m really, really, really sorry. So could you pleeeeeeeeease help me?"

"Well...you are sorry." Tweedledum said.

"And you do have fantastic jugs." Tweedledee added.

"Hey!" Alex snapped.

"Sorry, but you do."

"Well they’re sort of my problem. See, I drank this bottle and they got...well, like this."

"So what’s wrong with that?" Tweedledum asked. "Men will hurl themselves at you."

"Well they’ll definitely have to come to me, since I can’t walk."

"Oh, I suppose that is a bit of a problem." He tapped his chin. "We’ll take you to see the caterpillar. Maybe he can do something."

She yelped in shock as each little man grabbed one of her breasts and lifted. She ignored the incredible, pleasurable tingling sensation waving through her body and walked slowly behind the two men.

"Hey, Caterpillar!" Tweedledum called, as they approached a giant mushroom.

"What, you don’t know his name?" Alex asked.

"Erm...no." Tweedledee said. "No-one does. We just call him the Caterpillar."

"That you, Tweedle Brothers?" A voice demanded from the muchroom. Alex noticed smoke wafting from it.

"Yes!" The pair replied.

"Well what do you morons want?" They got so Alex could see the caterpillar, and he her. She saw that the smoke was coming from a hookah. "Didn’t I tell you two to leave me alo-YOWZA! Who are you?!"

"Alex, sir. They said you could help me with my...ah...problem."

"What problem?"

"THESE!" She shouted, hitting one of her breasts.

"What’s wrong with them? I think they’re nice!"

"Well I don’t!"

"Oh." The caterpillar looked quite upset by this. "Fine, then. Uh...you drank that little bottle outside the door?"

"Yes!"

"Well, then, take some of the mushroom from the left side."

Tweedledum dropped the breast he was supporting and tore off a chunk for Alex, who quickly took it and took a large bite. For a moment, nothing happened. Then, to her horror, her breasts began to grow again! Tweedledee shouted as he was quickly smothered by breast.

"YOU BASTARD!" Alex screamed, lifted off her feet by her expanding boobs.

"Sorry, I couldn’t resist." The Caterpillar chuckled. "The right side, the right side."

Tweedledum rushed and pulled off a piece, and Alex took two large bites. She was relieved to see her breasts rapidly shrink, and Tweedledum pulled his brother out from under them the moment he was able.

"Dee, speak to me!" He called. "Are you okay?!"

"Ohhhhhhhhh yeah." Tweedledee said. "I think I almost died."

"And you’re happy?!"

"Dum...think of a worse way to go than smothered by a boob."

"Got me there."

Alex watched as her breasts quickly returned to their old size. Smiling a bit, she took a tiny bite from the other piece of mushroom, and her breasts jumped a cup size. She slipped the piece into her pocket.

"Okay, Tweedle Brothers, be gone." The caterpillar said. The two egg-shaped fellows left, and Alice went to follow. "No no no. You stay. I get so few normal people to talk to around here."

"Or ones with such a great rack?" She asked.

"Exac-NO! I mean...ugh..." Annoyed, the caterpillar took a puff from his hookah.

"I’ve never actually seen one of those." Alex said, looking at it.

"Want a puff."

"Oh, no, I couldn’t!"

"Come on, give it a shot!" He puffed more and more rapidly, smoke surrounding him. "It’s quite pleasant. The water keeps the smoke nice and cool."

The smoke surrounded him, until he was invisible. The smoke, however cool, stung Alex’s eyes, forcing her to squeeze them shut. She smelt and felt the smoke dissipating, but still kept her eyes shut.

"Oh, bugger, why now?!" She heard a voice demand. She opened her eyes to see that caterpillar had somehow become a butterfly. "Just when I was getting to talk to a babe for once!"

That grumpy comment said, he flew off.

"Hmm...you know, maybe it would be interesting." Alex thought, staring at the hookah. "Aw, what the hell. You only live once."

She grabbed the end of the tube, and then ended up staring at it like it like it had just waved to her and said ’hello’. Though, she realized, that would not be all that surprising considering what kind of a day she’d had thus far. But the real problem was, she had no idea how to smoke it.

"Is it like a cigarette or a cigar?" She thought. "Do I inhale or puff?"

She just shrugged and placed the tube into her lips. She took a deep drag, but instead of the expected smoke she got a mouthful of dirty water. She swallowed half, and the rest she spat out in shock.

"Bleagh! I guess I puff."

But, now throughly grossed-out by the thing, she hopped off the mushroom and walked away. She felt a slight wave of nausea, but this passed rather quickly. She began to absorb the atmosphere of the place again. Rather unconsciously, she began readjusting the waist of her pants against an increasing tightness.

"Well, if I never find a way out of here, it wouldn’t be a bad place to live. Sure, it’s a bit strange and all, but..."

Her interior monologue was abruptly ended when she saw a massive set of grinning teeth floating on a low branch of a tree nearby. She took a few steps back, not sure what to make of this latest creature. Slowly, a body began to materialize around the mouth. It turned out to be a large, purple-and-pink cat.

"Hi there." It said, its voice deep.

"GAH!" Alex jumped back, scared. Then, still not actively thinking about it, she readjusted her pants. "Wait...why was that so shocking? I’ve met everything from talking rabbits to caterpillars today, so why not a talking cat that sounds like a refugee from Welcome Back, Kotter?"

"How should I know?"

"Huh?"

"How should I know the answer to your question?"

"Well...I wasn’t actually asking you."

"Then why did you say it?"

"I DON’T KNOW!"

"Hey, no need to get all worked up!" The cat glanced down all of a sudden. "Hey, babe, when’s it due?"

"When’s what due?!"

"The kid."

"What kid?" She glanced down at her stomach and screamed. Her stomach was swollen like a woman nine months pregnant and near delivery. Her shirt had rode up over her now-huge belly, and her pants down beneath it. "DAMMIT! Can’t I go five minutes without undergoing some freaky transformation?!"

NO, THAT’S THE POINT OF THIS WHOLE STORY

"Who said that?!"

IT IS I, THE ALL-SEEING, ALL-KNOWING, OMNIPOTENT AUTHOR!

"What? Author? What’s going on?!"

OOPS, YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO KNOW ABOUT ME. UH...I HAVE TO GET SOMETHING FROM THE CAR!

Giant footsteps could be heard running away, a door opened and slammed shut, and a car screeching away into the distance.

"I’m scared." Alex said.

"So am I." The cat replied.

"Wanna pretend that never happened?"

"Sure."

"Okay." Alex cleared her throat. "DAMMIT! Can’t I go five minutes without undergoing some freaky transformation?!"

They waited a beat for any response from the heavens. When none was forthcoming, the cat said:

"So I take it you ain’t pregnant?"

"NO!"

"Hmm...must’ve drank some of the caterpillar’s magic hookah water."

"Magic hookah water? Magic emergency brakes, magic cookies, magic potions, magic mushrooms. Is there anything that isn’t magic here?!"

"Yeah."

"What?"

"You."

Alex resisted the urge to grab the fat cat by its neck and squeeze.

"Is there anything I can do about all this?" She demanded, pressing her hands to her swollen abdomen. When she did, she realized that it was still growing, albeit slowly.

"Find a bathroom." That said, the cat slowly vanished, hius body vanishing first, leaving his teeth again. "Bye there."

The teeth vanished then, leaving Alex alone.

"Great, my clothes fit every time but this one!" She tugged down on her shirt, and was amazed to see it somehow expand and cover her growing gut. She did the same with her pants, and soon had her clothes right. Of course, her stomach continued to swell, and her shirt was soon skin-tight and riding up her belly again. "Great, manual readjustment."

She began running as best she could, hoping to find someone or something that could lend her a hand. Her belly was growing faster now, though, and running became hard. Her ever-expanding stomach caused her center of gravity to constantly change. She tripped and fell multiple times, landing on her sloshing, water-filled belly.

Her stomach was a good two feet out in front of her at its widest point, and her large breasts were being pushed up. She was reduced to a walk as her stomach continued to grow, still swelling with the strange water. She had given up on readjusting her clothes, and her gargantuan gut was exposed to the world.

Finally, with her stomach beginning to swell in all directions and not just out, a house came into sight. She began waddle-running for it, holding up her stomach as best she could.

She pushed past a lizard and a few other animals in suits, and they cursed at her loudly. She pushed through the door of the home, a rather tight fit, and looked desperately for a bathroom. Her stomach was sinking past her crotch, and a good foot or so out to either side of her. She wasn’t sure how she was remaining on her feet, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to for much longer.

She began checking every door she could find, until she opened one and saw a toilet. It was not a full bathroom, just a little hall with a toilet at the end.

"Thank God!" She said, waddling into the tiny space. She pushed in, her stomach sliding along the wall, until there was a sudden surge of growth. She could no longer move forward or back, her stomach pressing hard against the walls.

She cringed against the pressure along her stomach, until there wa a sudden release. The walls had given way, giving her plenty of room. She quickly got to the toilet.

Three hours later, a normal-looking Alex stumbled out of the bathroom. Suddenly, though, her stomach began to swell again.

"Crap."

Three more hours later, a normal-looking Alex stumbled out of the bathroom. She tentatively pressed her hands to her belly and waited. Waited. Waited. After ten minutes and no apparent growth, she left the house and continued her journey.

She found herself in a thick forest, with no sort of path or any signs to point the way to anywhere. After walking for some time, she began to get worried that she was going in circles or otherwise lost. Suddenly, though, she heard a screeching scream. She ran in the direction of the sound, figuring possible danger was better than dying in the forest.

Of course, she couldn’t have expected what she saw. There was a long table in the middle of a clearing, loaded with tea pots, tea cups, and trays of crumpets. At one end sat a brown rabbit in a suit, in a sugar bowl was a mouse, and at the other end was a short man with a huge nose and an enormous hat. He was the source of the screaming, for it seemed he had dropped a cup of tea onto his crotch.

"PAINPAINPAINPAINPAINHURTPAINPAINPAINPAINOWIEOWIEOWIEOWIEPAINHURTOUCHGONNASUESOMEONEOWOWOWOWOWOWOWHURT!"

"Are...are you alright?" Alex asked, walking over to him.

"Hmm, lemme think." The man in the hat replied. "I’ve been shouting pain, hurt, owie, and various other exclamations of pain, so...WHAT DO YOU THINK!"

"You certainly are an angry fellow." Alex said. "A mad hatter, one might say."

(The author apologizes again)

"I’m sorry, it’s just that the tea hurt quite a lot and the last thing I needed was a stupid question." The hatter looked her over, rather like the caterpillar had. "Please, let me make it up to you. Stay and have some tea and crumpets."

"Well..." She had become uneasy about ingesting anything in this weird land.

"Please!"

"I guess it has been a while since I’ve eaten."

She sat at the remaining chair, and sat rather uneasily. She took a cup of tea and took a tentative sip. It wasn’t all that bad. She began to drink a bit more, and before long was rather enjoying herself.

"Well...nothing so far. I’m not ballooning, my breasts are the same size, and I don’t look ready to give birth. I don’t think anything else could happen."

"Crumpet?" The hatter asked, gesturing to a tray near her hand.

"Sure, why not?" She smiled and took one of the little biscuits. She took a small bite, rather liked it, and ate the rest. No sooner had she done this, though, than a strange sensation washed over her body. She sighed, and began banging her head gently off the tabletop. "I’ll learn. Someday, I’ll learn. So what is it this time?"

Her stomach began to swell out in front of her again, and for a moment she thought it may have been a repeat of what had just happened. But she quickly realized that it was not taught this time, like it had been then. It was rather soft. Within a moment, the rest of ehr body was swelling in the same fashion.

"But it’s not ballooning again. So...oh." She sighed. "Oh, this is just super. I’m getting fatter."

With an exasperated look on her face, she just sat there and waited as she quickly gained more and more weight. Her belly was perhaps the largest part, a masive ball of flab pouring into her lap. Her breasts grew and sagged alongside her flabby gut, while her legs swelled with fat, pressing her thighs together. Her arms bloated, while she grew a second chin and quickly sprouted a third as her cheeks grew round.

She just sighed as her swelling hips and ass broke the arms of the chair away. She let out a quiet "ow" as the chair’s legs cracked and she landed flat on her unctuous underside, but otherwise showed little more than annoyance at her current situation.

She figured she was above four hundred pounds, if not more, when she finally stopped fattening. She tried getting to her feet, but to no avail. The brown rabbit and the mad hatter quickly ran over and helped her up. Her stomach sagged down nearly to her knees, and her legs pressed against one another.

"Magic crumpets?" She asked.

"Yeah."

"I thought as much." She rubbed her pudgy hands against her face. "Okay, you have any idea how to undo this?"

"Excercise and proper diet." The brown rabbit said.

"Something a little more simple. Magic slim fast? Magic anything?"

"There are the roses in the queen’s garden." The hatter said. "They say eating a single petal makes you lose ten pounds, and it’s how she’s kept her figure all these years."

"They also say that’s the reason she’s so protective of them." The brown rabbit added. "She has armed guards watching them all the time, and they have orders to capture whoever takes a rose so they can be publicly decapitated."

"Great. Armed guards. Decapitation. Spectacular." She began to walk away. "So where’s this rose garden?"

"Thataway." The hatter said, pointing left.

"Thataway." The rabbit said, pointing right.

"Thataway." The mouse said, pointing straight.

"I hate you all." Alex said.

"Yeah, well, they’re all morons." A deep voice said. Alex looked into a tree to see the familiar teeth of the Cheshire cat. "Come on, babe, follow me."

The cat hit the ground and walked off in a fourth direction. Really not sure if he was right, Alex waddled after him.

"There we are." The cat said, as he and Alex peeked out from behind a hedge at rows and rows of rose bushes. Each one had a funny-looking, playing-card man standing guard at it. "This is there I make my exit."

Suddenly, Alex lashed out with a fat arm and grabbed the cat by the scruff of his neck.

"Oh no you don’t!" She hissed at him. "You’re helping me!"

"Hey, I like my head right where it is."

"So do I, which is why you’re going to help!"

"Well why should I?"

"I’ll snap your neck if you don’t."

"Fine. What do I have to do?"

"We’ll hit that rose bush right there." Alex said, pointing a bit to their right. "None of the other guards are facing it. All you have to do is distract him, and I’ll get a rose."

"Sounds simple enough."

"Ooh, lookit the kitty!" The guard said, picking him up. "Who’s a cute widdle kitty? You are! Yes you are! Who’s a pretty kitty?"

"Oh, this is not worth it at all." The cat grumbled. "Especially since I ain’t getting anything in return for this."

"Ooh, kitty can talk! Yes he can!"

"Hey, Einstein, look behind you."

"Why, kitty?"

"Because someone’s stealing a rose."

"WHAT?!" The guard flung the cat into another bush, and spun. There he saw Alex holding a rose. "HALT!"

"I’m going to kill that cat." Alex said. Then she turned and ran.

Her entire body jiggled as she ran. Not accustomed to her size, and definitely not used to running and being so huge, she was quickly losing stamina. She tore off a petal and swallowed it, hoping something would happen.

It was barely perceptible, but she got a bit thinner. She quickly tore off a bunch of petals and ate them. She began to get thinner and thinner as she entered the forest. She ate the remaining petals, shrinking her to her original weight. She burst through the clearing with the hatter and ran past.

"LOOKOUT!" She called.

"Why?" The hatter asked. Then dozens of guards ran through the clearing, knocking everything over.

"I’M SUING!" The irate hatter screamed when everyone was gone.

Alex ran past the house she had ran into, and the guards were right behind her. Not the brightest fellows around, a lot of them hacked their way through the house instead of going around it.

She ran through fields and past the caterpillar’s mushroom. A few of the guard just attacked it for the sack of attacking it.

She got to the doorway out of the crazy place, and was relieved to see that it was a more normal size this time. She ran through it, back into the bottom of the pit, and slammed the door shut behind her. She heard the guards slam against it, and then heard them trudge away.

"Thank goodness it’s over!" Alex said, looking around. "Now how do I get out of here?"

There, on the ground, was the little emergency brake thing. She lifted it and smashed it open. She was prepared for the tube this time, and the inflation that quickly followed. She slowly lifted off the ground, and towards the top of the pit.

"Ohhhhh..." Alex opened her eyes and came to. She was in the middle of the woods again, lying next to a large hole in the ground. She looked down to see a pit with no visible end. "Wait...was it real?"

She stood up, shaking her head. She put her hands into her pocket, and was surprised to find a chunk of mushroom inside.

"Nah!" She said, looking at it. "Just a...well..."

Figuring it was the only way to find out, she took a bite.

"So what’s the patient’s name?" The doctor asked.

"Alexandra Smith." The nurse replied. "Seems she had a severe and strange allergic reaction to a mushroom of some kind."

"Well, let’s see." He opened the door of the hospital room, and saw a woman pinned under an enormous pair of breasts.

"Guess it was real." Alex thought.

All tags:

• floating
• magic

Login or register to tag items