magic

“Superior Lace Underwire, this is Suzie.”

“Hello, I’m trying to procure some unmentionables for my wife, but I’m not even sure if it’s feasible given her unusual requirements. I’m wondering if you could help.”

“Custom lingerie is our specialty.”

“Excellent. By the way, I’ve always thought the name was devilishly clever.”

“To be honest, I never cared for it. Over the top if you ask me.”

“Shouldn’t that be under?”

“You’re pretty clever yourself.”

“I can’t help it, it runs in the family.”

Pffffft. The genie arrived without fuss and smoke.

“Cool. Do I get three wishes?”

He checked his outfit.

“Wrinkle-free folding my ass.”

“Excuse me, but I just let you out. Do I get three wishes or not?”

“What? Oh, yeah. Thanks. Fire away.”

“I want you to help me with my new years resolutions.

“Take your time. I’m not going anywhere.”

“I already told you.”

“You’re allowed to think about these things, map out possible consequences, make sure I’m not going to give you a Twilight Zone ending.”

Shelia cocked an eyebrow. “So you’re going as Marilyn Monroe?”

“No,” Skye replied resolutely, looking away from the mirror. “I’ll be wearing a blood-stained scarf around my neck.”

“Right,” said her roommate. “I don’t get it.”

“Car crash. The urban legend says she was decapitated,” sighed Skye, returning to the mirror. “It’s not true, but that doesn’t matter anymore – all anybody remembers is the myth. Like the Richard Gere gerbil thing.”

“Skye, you’re going as a blonde in vintage clothes. All anybody remembers is Marilyn Monroe.”