first person

Jessica

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I once knew this girl named Jessica… Key word is once, but this is her story, and I am a witness.

It all started around 2 weeks ago, when Jessy and her friends were at lunch. “So Jess, what are you doing Friday?” and “ Yeah? You going to John J’s Party?” and things that 16 year old girls say to each other. I had just finished my lunch and was half listening to their conversations when I decided to pull out my game boy and play a little Namco Classics, when my friend Curtis walked up.

“So Chad, you playing some games here at lunch big guy? No friends?”

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Average: 3.7 (17 votes)

Amanda the Balloon Girl

It was my first day at Gremlin's toy shop. I had always wanted to work with children, so this was a big thing, and even though I was going to have to start at the bottom doing menial and probably humiliating tasks I was really looking forward to it.

I was now sitting in an ancient-looking, clean but dimly-lit wood-panelled room with an antique looking oak desk behind which sat an antique looking oak gentleman in a tweed suit. This contrasted with the public part of the shop, which was trendy and modern, all chrome and glass with the latest gadgets for children everywhere.

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Average: 4.3 (14 votes)

Racer X

Three days before the race and I was incredibly nervous as I stood with the other unhired racers in a row, hoping to be hired. My black rubber gas suit bore my pressure stat “425” in large proud white letters across my swollen belly as I stood with my hands behind my back. Problem was, so were my other eight competitors, six women and two men. Women had more natural adaptability for this than men did; among men, I was a minor celebrity. The crowds were still milling around as a young debutante—tight sweater, tight jeans--strolled up to me, all hips and lips and boobs.

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Average: 4.2 (6 votes)

The Air Potion, Part 1

John's gotten his hands on an air potion, and decides to find out what it does.

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Average: 3.7 (12 votes)

Liquid Helium

“Our little project has come to fruition,” I said. “I think it’s time.”

“I’ll be right over,” she said excitedly, and hung up the phone.

Kim wasn’t fat. Curvy, yes, a little overweight, okay--but as a dancer, well, every line that isn’t straight is considered a detriment. She’d approached me to create a solution that would help her lose weight fast in time for the dance concert. What she didn’t know is that I’d failed spectacularly. Nothing worked, and a handful of lab rats with gastrointestinal distress was hardly a sign of success.

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Average: 3.9 (14 votes)

Blow Job

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There's a knock on the door. I wheel over, its Jake. Jake comes in and immediately he wants to know what's up.

I start explaining it to him. "its the craziest thing I've had happen to me in a long time." He stopped me, "Well you've had a lot of crazy things happen. So tell me something new." I frowned at him, "Come on man, are you going to let me tell you about what happened or not?" He shrugged his shoulders, "Ok, so tell me."

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Average: 3.6 (14 votes)

Inflationary Tales, Part 3

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or, “1001 Inflationary Nights”

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Average: 3.3 (6 votes)

Inflationary Tales, Part 2

or, “1001 Inflationary Nights”
 

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Average: 3.6 (9 votes)

My Favorite Balloon Party

or, "Illogical, Gratuitous Inflation with Hot Celebrity Chicks"

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Average: 4.1 (24 votes)

Girl with the Inflating Dream, A

It was a sunny day and I was inside writing my tenth inflation to post on the internet. Once I had finish writing the story, I began to proof read it and when I got to the inflation part I couldn’t believe how bad it was. So I ripped it up and threw it into the trash with my other thousand attempts.

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Average: 3.5 (8 votes)
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